Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Windmill 1 Hamsters 4

The Olympic Delivery Authority announced today that it has solved the problem of providing green electricity for the London Olympics of 2012. The Authority suffered a set-back recently when their plans to build a windmill were thrown out as unfeasible. This was originally claimed to be the result of new regulations on the construction of windmills. However there has been much speculation that the local community had objected to having an ugly great windmill anywhere near where they live. A spokesman for the residents said recently "These ugly great things belong in the countryside not in my back yard."

Instead of a windmill the Authority is putting it faith in hamsters. The idea is that 4 particularly active hamsters will be placed in 4 specially designed exercise wheels fitted with dynamos. The hamsters will run in these wheels and generate electricity. Doubts have been raised as to whether the hamsters will provide sufficient power. However an independent expert in power generation has concluded that 4 Hamsters will generate considerably more power that the proposed windmill, or indeed any windmill producing power in the UK today.

The RSPCA initially raised issues over the welfare of the hamsters but when it was pointed out that the Olympic Delivery Authority is covered by Crown Immunity a spokesman for the RSPCA said "If we don't get to take somebody to court we aren't interested." Pressed on the potential mistreatment of the hamsters she said "Bugger the hamsters, we just got a report of a bloke in Hounslow saying nasty things to a cat, easy prosecution, I'm off."


  1. One of those hamsters powers my car....

  2. Bucko

    Not a Prius I hope ;-)

    My first car had similar problems. It was a Renault 4, something like an 850 cc engine, 6 volt electrics, gearstick in the middle of the dashboard. I still managed to roll the damn thing.